Six for Six

In honor of Dave and my six year anniversary, I am writing six wonderful things about him.  I did this last year, and upon reviewing it, I am going to try and find some new things-- but that doesn't mean those things still aren't wonderful and alive.

1.  Your faith.  Well, I can't not mention this.   It was the most attractive thing about you when I met you, and it still is-- which says a lot.  I still remember the devotion you gave on our way home from Mexico in 2003.  You were such a HUNK up there reading from your Bible in your cargo shorts and glasses.  You snored all night in that huge gym, but I forgot all about it when you prayed!  Seriously, you live your faith out in your everyday life, words, and actions-- and I admire that about you.  I'm lucky to have you.

2.  The way you put me at ease.  You know just how to make me laugh.  You do wonders for my anxiety ("I know what would help, let's worry") and you loosen me up!  Before I met you, I was like a square who needed softer edges.  Thank you for helping me relax, and reminding me that perfection is not the goal.  You are a great communicator, and when I'm in a ridiculous tizzy you are clear and use language I swear you read in my counseling books.  

3.  You are a great dad.  You are wonderful with Dekker.  You are such an involved Dad and Dekker is so lucky.  I love hearing you put Dekker to bed, play games with him, read him books and sing him songs-- even the National Anthem.  Because you are right, there is nothing wrong with having a patriotic child.  Thanks for not calling it "babysitting" and instead calling it "parenting" when I'm away for the weekend or working for the night, or need my own time-out in the middle of the day!

4.  You cry.  Or, you get something in your eye every baptism at church, occasionally when you see Dekker do something wonderful (or wonderfully ordinary), see an ultrasound, see any female in your family cry, when we say good-bye to special family members, when we talk about or read something sad, and when you watch X-Men.  Well, maybe that was actually something in your eye, I'm not sure.  You are such a man's man, and that's why I love this trait about you.

5.  Your mad DIY skills.  The basement looks awesome-- new windows, electrical, framing, trim and all.  Your skills are all over this house, and I love this house.  You have saved us so much money, and heaven knows that I have nice taste.

6.  That you are never done dreaming, planning, thinking about the future.  It strikes my insecurity ("What's wrong with what we have?") but makes me smile, too.  God has wired you up to be a learner, and I want to be the person you share what you're learning with.

Happy Anniversary Dear.

We had a great anniversary weekend-- we dropped Dekker off in Lincoln with Grandpa and Nana Saturday lunch time.  He climbed right into their truck and popped into the car-seat.  We buckled him in and he said "Bye Mom.  Bye D."  He did not cry one tear-- he is so big and oh my he loves those two.  We came home and had a wonderful evening out-- light dinner, movie, sushi.  Then we slept until 9AM (oh how I miss that) and had lunch before we walked around Trader Joe's and went to pick up Dekker.  It was just 24 hours, but it was fun.  And we genuinely enjoy "windshield time" so it was great.  It was great to see Dekker, too.  He cried when he left Nana and Grandpa, in case you were wondering :)

Here's to year number Seven!

On the journey,

Mae

Oh Baby!

Well, I just had a terrific 16 week appointment.  I am still in the phase of "Do you really think there is anything in there?" Low and behold, the doctor let me hear the heartbeat again and sure enough, there is a real-live being in my stomach.  It's soooo weird and equally as wonderful at the same time.

This post assumes two things: You care that I am pregnant, and these are questions you might have asked.  In a Q&A format, I'll pretend like someone wanted to know these answers-- and even if you don't, I'll be glad for the "dear Diary" entry when I look back, I'm sure.

Q1. Did you get pregnant on the cruise?
No.  We had a lovely cruise and our date of conception is several weeks after we got home.

Q2.  Were you "trying"?
Not necessarily.  But we know how babies are made.  We were doing Natural Family Planning.

Q3.  So did Natural Family Planning fail?
No.  I was being very lazy in doing my part because I knew we were close to trying and it was something we had talked about many a nights.  I knew if this happened, we wouldn't be upset, uninsured, etc.  BUT, I will say that NFP has been a wonderful method for us and we encourage anyone considering it to check out the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility."

Q4.  Did you have any early signs/symptoms?
Not that I can remember.  I had been having pretty irregular cycles and did have what I thought was a really short and light cycle.  I had a talk with my sweet friend who is a PA and she suggested it could be hormonal and that talking to my OB wouldn't be a bad idea.  So I would say this incomplete, weird cycle was my only major clue, which really wasn't one considering the symptoms.

Q5.  So then what?
Well, I called my OB's office and left a message for the nurse.  In the mean time, I took a test because wouldn't that be embarrassing and sure enough... Positive.  I took it downstairs to Dave and said, "I don't know if I should cry or laugh."  We were both pretty shocked, but thrilled.

Q6.  You miscarried before Dekker, did this change anything with this pregnancy?
Not a lot, but my doctor did do routine blood work.  When I miscarried my progesterone was very low-- a classic indicator-- so she ran that and HCG.  Both came back great.  I was to repeat the HCG in 48 hours to make sure it was doubling as appropriate.

I got a call from the nurse who said that my HCG was very low.  She said it was a 94 suggesting I was just a few days pregnant.  I said that was very possible.  Then, when I went back for the second round of blood-work she said, "Mrs. Rowe there has been a mistake, please come back with me."  I was horrified.  Turns out my levels were 94,000 indicating I was 3-9 weeks pregnant.  So we didn't even re-do the blood work considering my progesterone was so good.

A few days later my doctor was back in town and we did an ultrasound to "date the pregnancy."  I was 7.5 weeks along.  That made us laugh.  I literally knew I was pregnant with Dekker days after conception!

Q7.  When is your due-date?
November 16.  This date is so significant to me.  My sweet Grandma Soden passed away when I was quite pregnant with Dekker.  I traveled to see her, spoke at her funeral-- I am even named after her.  She is very special in my life and her birthday is... November 16.  It might be incorrect theology to say so, but I believe this was a very personal touch from God-- a little note to me that He is in control, and that He loves me so much that I believe He gets pleasure from lining up the universe so I would "accidentally" get pregnant and be due on Grandma Soden's birthday.  This due date has brought me so much peace, and brought me to nearly the ugly cry at that doctor's appointment.

Q8.  Do you think it's a girl or boy?
Girl.  And I'll name her after Grandma Soden.  I hope she'll share our middle name of Mae and that she's born on her due date.  But, I love the idea of "brothers" too, so I'll be okay either way.  We have our 20 week scan on June 29th.

Q9.  How have you been feeling?
Mostly good.  I have had more low-grade but constant nausea with this pregnancy-- which gets annoying, but I am so lucky, and I know it.  I have only gained 3 lbs and have been able to stay really active so far-- mostly walking.  I told my doctor that I gained half of my pregnancy weight BEFORE I got pregnant and she just smiled and said it's okay for the baby to live off my "reserves."  Ahem, okay.

Q10.  How did you tell your parents?
We bought a "Big Brother" T-Shirt and let Dekker wear it.  We told my folks when they were here for Dekker's 2nd birthday party, and Dave's the Monday after.  It was so fun.  They are so excited for us, and for Dekker, who loves "babies" and will be one heck of a big brother.  I have been emotional, of course, thinking about sharing both my time and attention, but I'm praying that what people have told me is true-- and that another part of my heart will come to life to love this child so that I am not dividing my love.  I love my brother, so I am trying not to apologize to Dekker, but think about what a blessing this is to him.

I have been really eating well and drinking water and blah blah.  But my one pregnancy craving so far has been Runza.  And Dave just got home with my "one per week" Runza.  So I better go!

On the Journey,
Stef

Book Study

I am embarking on a book study with some wonderful ladies-- "God's Girls" so we've come to call ourselves-- at work.  We are studying through the book "Made to Crave: Satisfying your deepest desire with God, not food" by Lysa Terkeurst.  My initial thought was that this would be interesting at best, but it has hit home much closer than I anticipated.  How often do I run to food for comfort, as a reward, when I feel joy or experience stress, when I am sad, happy or bored?  Painfully, more often than I'd like.  The issue at hand isn't my pant size, but my heart condition.  And one is growing and the other isn't, if you get my drift.

God never intended we love anything more than we love him.

Interesting!  I particularly related to the story in Matthew 19, where a rich young man comes to see Jesus and explains that he is following all the rules but recognizes something is missing.  "All of these (rules) I have kept", he says to Jesus.  "What do I still lack?"  Jesus responds by telling him to sell all his possessions to the poor.  And the man goes away... sad... because he doesn't want to give up the ONE thing that consumes him. 

In other words-- Jesus wants us to give up the one thing we crave more than Him.

What is it for you?  What do you crave more than God?  Is it food?  Appreciation?  Comfort?  Money?  Pleasing others?   Clothes?  Home decor?  Well behaved kids?  A well taken care of house?  Exercise?  Being well respected at work?  Approval from peers? Appearance?

As I prepare for our book study, does anyone have an idea about how we can "reward" ourselves without food?  This might show you how far gone I am.  I can't imagine rewarding myself with a pedicure or new shirt, because then aren't I trading one craving for another?  Is the answer here that I should pray to be content celebrating with God and not "rewarding" myself on this green Earth?  Can I reward myself with a new iTunes download if it's Christian music?  This is me, calling out for help :)  Would love to hear from you on this one.

The other thing I have been thinking honestly about is all my excuses for not eating more healthy and maintaining an overall healthy lifestyle.  Things like:
* It's not that bad the way it is.
* I should learn to love myself the way I am
* It's my age
* It's my metabolism
* It's my genetics
* Surely it's not Runza, hamburgers and fries and chips!
* This is a bad time to start a new healthy lifestyle-- I'm pregnant.
* This is a bad time to start a new healthy lifestyle-- I have small kids.
* I have the rest of my life to be healthy
* I should focus more on Dekker/raising kids for this season of life

I am putting together that the most important thing I can do to be the Mom, friend, wife, daughter, employee, that I can be is to love God more.  And to love God more, I need to surrender the things that I crave more than Him.

I hate to write this publicly.  Next time you see me saddled up to the salsa at La Mesa just know I'm a work in progress, okay.

Bless you all.

On the journey,
Stef

New Beginnings

Can I just say that I count my job as one of the most difficult blessings I have ever endured.  I am a person of great anxiety without God's help.  I listen to people share the story of how my greatest fears have acted out in their life.  I am in a constant battle to trust God more, as I turn over to Him my fears and trust that even IF something like this happens to me-- He will be there.  My patients are some of the most courageous, honest, faithful people I know.

That being said, it has been a difficult two years since making the move from the hospital to private practice.  It was very difficult at first, which I expected to some degree.  Toss in a 5 month old and I was humbled.  Now, toss in a 2 year old and a newborn come this fall, and I am... ready to move on.  I can't say enough how this has nothing to do with the actual work that I do.  I love sitting in session guiding and encouraging the people God has brought to me.  But I don't love checking my work phone and email seven days a week, being "on call" for emergencies 24 hrs a day, returning calls at 11PM-- or over my entire nap time for that matter.  I don't love the hours of paperwork I do and working 10 hour days only to see four clients.  I am my own secretary, office manager, emergency on-call line, files auditor, marketing manager, suicide prevention hot-line, case consultant... you get the picture.  I am a one man show.  I have worked with professionals and friends over the past two years to have better boundaries, to leave work at work, to find some help with tough cases, to take care of myself, to do strategic marketing, to keep up on my paperwork.  It has helped tremendously.  But what I have realized over the last year-- and 6 months particularly-- is that this is not the type of work God has wired me up to do.

Counseling is for me.  I have spent a lot of time in thought and prayer trying to answer the questions "Is it what I'm doing" or "Where I'm doing it?"  The answer I have decided is... both... for now.

"Where I'm doing it?"  I can't imagine a day when I go back into private practice.  I would love to do individual counseling in a clinic, or in a hospital again-- but I doubt it will be on my own.  I am wired up to work with a team of people.  Period.

"What I'm doing?"  I also can't imagine going the rest of my life without going back to traditional counseling someday.  But I can't foresee being the mom and wife I want to be juggling a caseload like what I have right now.  This is the ... for now... that I referenced above.  I'm ready for a break, and any counselor-educator will tell you that a burnt out counselor is no counselor at all.

"So what's next?"  Well, I have been praying about this regularly.  In November I had a painful discussion with the owner of the practice where I sit.  Since then, I have been praying and praying that God would help me live out my "Strongest Life."  On New Years Eve I cried to my dad on my Grandma's couch in Colorado.  I remember saying "something has to change!"  He is wise, and he told me to be strategic but to not stay in a job that is getting me down "just because."  In January, I made a 6 month commitment to myself that I would quit looking at other practices and develop a thankful and willing attitude at work.  Which I think I have done a great job at.   I committed to praying about my work future and seeking wise counsel.  I wanted to be strategic, and cause the least amount of transition to the wonderful families and people I work with.

Last fall I taught ONE CREDIT at Grace University in the Graduate Counseling Department. It was a great experience.  I kept praying about this-- thinking that it felt good in my soul-- strong, if you will.  I started applying for adjunct positions this spring (for the fall), then stopped when I found out I was pregnant.  Who wants to hire a pregnant adjunct?  Then a great opportunity came up this spring when Nebraska Christian College approached me to teach half-time in the Family Life and Counseling department.  My mentor and friend is leaving, and his open office left an open space for me.  I have been interviewing and negotiating.  I signed the papers last Friday.  It will be two days a week, 2 classes a semester.  My hours are 9:00-4:30.  No nights.  No on-call.  They are willing to work around my "family schedule".  I start in August, and I am THRILLED.

I met up with said mentor for a two hour meeting Thursday.  He was super honest about the challenges of teaching and the BIG job I have ahead of me regarding curriculum and balancing this new job with the challenges of balancing a newborn.  Well said, good friend.

To say I am relieved is an understatement.  The past two years have been full of depression and self-doubt and struggle-- and mono, weight gain, and a horrible blow to my self-esteem.  I am praying that working within the way God has wired me up (a weaver and teacher via the Strong Life Test) will relieve some of this. At the same time, going through this season of life has kept me humbled and on my knees-- to say the least.  I hope my work is never so "good" that I'm not forced to my knees.

Finally, big thanks to Marcus Buckingham for showing me that I don't have to fight against my strengths and can instead find ways to work within them.  He hits the nail on the head that most women spend so much energy trying to prove to ourselves and others that we can overcome our weaknesses (i.e. like working alone in a private practice) instead of working within our strengths.  If that sounds like something you need to learn more about you should check out his book "Find your Strongest Life," but be warned-- it's not a light read.

Here's to new beginnings.

On the journey,
Stef

Allergy Testing

I am sure that my faithful three readers are thrilled to see a new post-- and about the very exciting world of allergy testing to boot :)  God Love you.  We did have an experience this week that I thought was worth writing about.

First, you should know that I have terrible allergies.  My neighbor in McCook used to call me "the kid with all the allergies."  As a young child, I would repeatedly get sick-- just over and over again.  In fact, at this time in my life I once heard my (very calm but at the time frustrated) mom use the term "dumb doctor"-- probably on the phone explaining to a girlfriend that they couldn't stop the infections from re-occurring.  So they did several types of tests and my mom explains that it was somewhat scary not knowing the problem.  I can only imagine myself in her shoes-- heaven help my anxiety and please Lord stop my fingers from typing childhood cancer into Google one more time.  Anyway, she took me to another doctor at some point, where I repeated the phrase "that dumb doctor better not say its just an infection" on the table, in front of the doctor.

Blah Blah, finally they did some allergy testing and low and behold, I was allergic to everything non-food.  Almost every environmental allergy, all indoor allergies, cats, other farm animals, dust, dirt-- seriously I'd have to live in a bubble to avoid them.  So, in the 2nd grade, I had my first allergy surgery where they went in through my gums (like my mouth) and put a "window" in my sinus to help drain things.  Years later we discovered this surgery was highly unsuccessful.  I did allergy shots into adulthood, nose sprays, another procedure, and eventually learned to be as proactive as possible-- and to live with it.  That's why last summer's bout with mono was so weird-- my doctor and I kept thinking it was allergies.  Though I am not the expert, nor do I order the testing-- thank you very much.  #youmissedthediagnoises

So Dekker has a history of MSPI, dry skin patches, and re-occurring ear infections-- all signs of allergies.  We're not sure if he had mono last summer too, or not-- but he has been sick a lot.  This April at his 2 year appointment our family doctor was concerned that he was "only mouth breathing" and stated that he does have almost constant upper respiratory distress.  He sounds like a cat when he breaths.  So she started him on Zyrtec and suggested allergy testing.  I put it off, and several weeks of Zyrtec later he wasn't any better.  I called and asked if there was anything else they could do for him.  The doctor added a nose spray and a curt reminder that I had not followed her order yet to get testing.  So I made an appointment with the allergist.

I was skeptical.  To say the least.  My sweet friend Suzanne, a PA, explained to me the benefits with a general "Why not?" attitude, coupled with "You're going to meet your massive deductible anyway..." and I decided to be compliant with my doctor.  This also started my rants involving statements like, "I already know he has allergies.  To know grass vs dust does not help me?"  And, "Seriously, who does NOT have allergies?" 

Monday Dave and I took him in.  Do I have the best husband or what?  They did a thorough history.  This is the best Dekker has been in a long while, and since we started the nose spray he had been miraculously better.  They wrote numbers up his back, pricked over the number with environmental allergies, indoor allergies, and some food allergies.  We were instructed to walk the halls for 15 minutes and distract him.  This was no problem and in 15 minutes that kid was as happy as a shirtless toddler at the water-fountain.

He had no allergies.

Nope, not one.  What the Heck?  Why all the illness?  The sweet doctor explained that he has reflux.  "REFLUX?"  No spit up here, lady doctor.  I mean he spit up a lot as a baby, but not now.  She went on to educate me about toddler reflux and how the main concern is inflammation.  This creates an environment for common colds to get out of hand and become infections.  Apparently, ear infections are also very common with reflux, and it is almost always worse at night.  And guess what the best treatment for the reflux is?  The nose spray.  It is an anti-inflammatory.  No wonder he has been doing so well.  This is not a rare diagnosis, but it's not overly common, either.  In the end, his bump-less back was "good news."

All in all, I want a happy healthy kid.  So I am SO glad we did the testing.  No more Zyrtec.  No need to keep giving him medicine he won't need.  And hopefully the nose spray will help keep his colds manageable, which means less antibiotics, which I am thrilled about.  To see his totally clear back was somewhat humbling, but I have decided there is nothing embarrassing about trying to be a good mom, even if I did misdiagnose him in the form of my rants all month.  After all, I am not a doctor.  And my doctor missed the boat on this one, too.  #youmissedthediagnosisagain.  Though to her credit, she sent me for the testing because this isn't her specialty, either.

So there you have it.  We had stopped the nose spray 36 hrs before the appt and I was giving it to him in the parking lot!!  We had a great experience at Midwest Asthma and Allergy, and we hope to never go back there :)  And even though I personally can not even fathom a life without allergies, I'm so glad my son will get to!

On the journey,
Mae

Quick 5

Well I'm kinda sad that all my posts are called Quick 5.  I need to do a better job of getting to this blog, especially because I love it. 

On any account, I went to Bed, Bath and Beyond today.  As I've said before I could fill up a cart there in a nanosecond and frankly I really have to watch myself.  Because suddenly I think that I need everything in sight-- like a fancy coffee maker (really might need one of those!), hamburger patty maker, dog bed, colorful tote, clearance pillow-- or anything off their impressive "As Seen On TV" wall.  Take me now, I need a list and a budget before I go there.  Thankfully, shopping with a 2 year old puts the brakes on things fairly quickly as he doesn't really offer a lot of time to lolly-gag around the store.  When we run errands he typically entertains himself with the cart seat-belt, which he likes to try and put together but can't quite get yet ("don't pinch yourself....").  Today he entertained himself by saying "hi" to every.single.person and by singing to himself.  The combo was DELIGHTFUL and absolutely adorable.  After a morning of whining and crying and getting into everything, I was thankful for a happy, contained boy.

Here is what I bought--
1.  A new non stick pan.  Simply Calphon Nonstick pan.  David hates ours, and I equally do-- and he has asked me several times to get a new one.  This one is hand wash only.  Did you know all non-stick is suppose to be washed in "non citrus" soap-- so no lemon scent, flowery scent, etc.  I asked for help and the little gal pointed me in the direction of several, and I chose this one based on price and quality-- it feels perfectly "middle ground" to me.  Planned purchase.  With a coupon.

2.  Salad Spinner.  I went with the OXO brand because I think they own half of BB&B.  Anyway, I feel like my salad has tasted "dirty" lately, so this was on my list even though I had no idea it was $30!  I got our first one as a gift (and I loved it) and I think Dekker broke it as a baby because who wouldn't love a glorified "top" in the kitchen cabinet.  My mother in law recently discovered some fantastic salad dressing plus my subscription to e-mealz has me eating more salads--- I forgot where I was going with that.  Planned purchase.  With a coupon.

But my son was just being so well behaved and I was roaming the aisles.  I was out of coupons, and I think purchasing anything there without one is against the law, but nay, there I wondered.

3.  Dish Drying Mat.  Even as I look that link up I am thinking, "What?  It's for dedicates?"  Well, I bought it because it looks super absorbent and I'm going to need that with my hand-washing non-stick, you know.

4.  Non-stick grilling basket.  Don't even ask and it was $6.  But I have high hopes that I can grill up all those veggies I plan to buy at the Farmers Market this summer.  Of course, that would mean that I plan ahead to get up and go to the Farmers Market, but you know. 

5.  Earthstone Grill Stone.  "Common Dekker, we need to go.  Mommy's out of money."

I mentioned my e-mealz subscription and all I can say is that I'm not ready to say anything yet.  We have tried a few recipes and have found the ingredients to be flexible, so I'm still giving it at least a moderate thumbs up at this time.  I loved having my grocery list printed for me and categorized!

I have been loving this weather and walking quite a bit.  So thankful for the warm sun, a sweet and healthy boy, a flexible job to be at home with him, a hard working hubby that makes it happen.  We are counting our blessings, for sure.

On the journey,
Stef

Quick 5

Oh my goodness I do not know where my time goes but it has not involved this blog for too long.   For some reason, when I get behind enough, I just kinda shrug like "Where do I start?" and then I don't start at all.  blah blah yada yada yada.

So I will add a few "quick" updates as they come to my mind:
1.  Dekker turns 2 this Thursday.  I can not have a birthday of his without remembering the day my water broke in CPR class and we met him for the first time.  Or the way I bossed the nurses around demanding a grilled cheese sandwich, and the way my husband looked as he was transformed into a Dad.  God has been so.good.to.us. 
2.  We had a crazy weekend with a fun party at the indoor play area at our church and my folks stayed Saturday night.  Dekker got lots of great toys, like a lawn mower, trike, wagon, tool bench and basketball hoop.  He also got some great new books and some clothes and probably other things I'm forgetting but am grateful for.  He has lots of words now like: eye, elbow, Mom, MOM, Hi, Dad, GraPa, Nana, Josie, No, NO, pew-y, please, more, and the list goes on.  He is so big.
3.  Admist all my love for him, we had a stay at home day today.  I purposefully planned nothing for today knowing we'd be recovering from the weekend.  I was thrilled it was so windy when I woke up, because that gives me a great excuse to play inside all day.  Except that by 10AM I'm clutching the Lego's bag half insane claiming "No, we are not going to dump these out again Dekker" and trying to forget my problems with Kathie Lee and Hoda.  I think my mental health might have done better with a walk and break at the park!
4.  I downloaded my first "E-Mealz" shopping list and menu today.  I got a $2/month special off one of the thousand on-line daily coupon sites (which I love) called moolala.com.  So I spent $12 for 6 months and then had a limited selection of menus to chose from.  I wanted to do the Weight Watchers menu but it wasn't available with the special so I did the low-fat instead.  This week's menu does look good.  It even has side dishes.  My list took approximately 5 minutes to print out, modify and add some of our staples to.  I'm headed to the store when Dekker gets up.  No real feedback yet-- I'll see how the shopping, recipes, portions, etc turn out before I get too excited.  E-Mealz has limitations for sure, but I'm as excited as I have been in awhile about menu planning and grocery shopping.
5.  My bestie Beth and I had a wonderful long weekend in Des Moines.  We saw the movie Lincoln Lawyer, which was suspenseful and fun.  We shopped World Market and the beautiful Jordan Creek mall.  We ate at lots of fun restaurants not in Omaha.  And we did a 1/2 day at a spa staffed by students.  It was quite the experience!  They were late getting started but the massage and facial were pretty good.  The mani/pedi was rushed and, frankly, horrible and the scalp massage/hair wash/blow-dry didn't happen because we were so far behind the gun due to the late start.  I wrote an email that night to the "spa" and I have been playing phone tag with the staff to see who to send it to.  Basically, though it was still a great experience and seriously gave us enough material to laugh about for years.
I am forgetting so much!  But for now I am going to spend the last 15 minutes of this nap time picking up around here!
On the Journey,
Stef